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Stanford falls flat on its face against UCLA in Pac-12 semifinals

It was simply awful

Ethan Miller

I wonder what Isaac Newton would have said about Stanford basketball.

His first law says that an object in motion stays in motion. But that one doesn't really fit. Maybe he would have had to make up another rule: an object that began inconsistent will stay inconsistent.

A day after blasting Arizona State off the floor, the Cardinal could barely muster enough effort to lose by 25. The story of Johnny Dawkins' Stanford teams never really changes.

Sure, UCLA was a knife all too willing to go through hot butter - Travis Wear didn't miss a shot, going 8-8 from the floor - but this was a downright embarrassing conclusion to the season for Stanford. At one point they were down 62-36. That's about as bad as it gets between two teams that weren't all that different in the regular season.

But unless voters recoil in Texas-Chainsaw-Massacre-like horror at the box score, it won't really matter for Stanford in the short term. They're almost certainly assured an 8, 9 or 10 seed come selection Sunday. And thus Johnny Dawkins and company came to Vegas, got what they wanted, and left town with a blazing hangover and a bad taste in their mouths after the third night. Sounds about typical.

In lieu of any more real analysis - what can really be said about a game that ugly - I do want to take a moment to acknowledge just how atrocious Stanford's black road jerseys are. They are easily the worst thing ever to come out of Stanford basketball. Furthermore, it's supposed to be representative of a school that's mascot is "a shade of the color red." It's like if Alabama chose to begin wearing deep navy blue because they wanted to give as much credence to the "tide" part of their nickname as they do the "crimson" part. I hope the next basketball coach scraps them.

Selection Sunday is March 16 at 6 pm eastern.